My Dad was never a protective Dad in the sense that most girls experience. He was in other ways that felt like him controlling my life to the point where I couldn’t be a child. Not allowing me to be social.
As far as protection goes, it was a miss-connect to him. Mentally he wasn’t capable of it… he had no clue.
As a feminine woman, feeling supported and protected is paramount. It is innate. I’ve been with men that were so feminine that they let it be known, I was on my own. I’d be the one protecting myself and even him if something happened.
Sexist, no. It isn’t. It’s innate for some women. Now others can get in a ring and fight with a lot of strength and vigor. That is great! They might enjoy protecting a man or their SO whatever the gender.
I’ve been with men that protected me in such a loving way, it was one of the most amazing feelings — it was incredible! I loved it!
I can say that without a doubt — I won’t settle for less. I know in my heart that what I want to experience is support and protection and strength from a man.
Now with that said, someone can say that it is due to my unmet childhood needs…. Ok, that is their opinion. I’ve healed that. I’ve experienced both ways and I can say that, I am clear.
I can take up for myself to a point. I don’t have expectation that I won’t ever have to again. But, when I can’t. Or when it gets to be too much. I’d feel really cherished if he was there for me in that way. Over the top!
I have so many mixed feelings. My Dad was never a protective Dad. Him being sick brings up this issue. I never know when he will go…. with his issues, it could be anytime. It makes me ponder all of this.
I believe in healthy attachment, not total autonomy. I believe in connection. I believe in mutual support and care for our partners. I believe in “taking up for our partners” I believe in protection . I believe in plain ole “ I have your back baby!”. #ConscioiuslyAwakeCoun